Does this HEMI count...?

MrBigwood · Mar 1, 2005

In an attempt to increase the Georgia chapter membership I have decided to put forth a serious recruiting drive.It will be a two pronged attack on our states numbers.I hope to drop from the hind tit we are sucking and knock Florida or even the Goliath state of Texas off the high flow nips.It won't be easy...we will have to blindside them with something sneaky like a ex-Catholic Schoolgirl topless car wash/Bar-b-Q pledge drive.The second part of my plan involves a much more long term strategy.I plan to raise an army of HEMI Heads from scratch.I know this may sound insane now, but in 17 years we will see who is laughing.This will of course require that I begin knocking up local women immediately and with precision efficiancy and purpose.I am already planning "Bigwoods Insemination for the HEMI Nation Festival" and have a lot of baby oil money already stashed.This is gonna get big.Anyhow...I was also considering letting some possible grey area HEMI's into the club.
You see friends...I am reaching out to those who may not normally get in due to "technicalities", such as the definition of HEMI truck. There is a HEMI truck in my tiny village that gets outrun by just about everything with wheels.Still, Fernando' , the owner, gives it all she's got each time he comes to the line. I will let you guys make the call here.I am posting a picture of Fernandos ride....one VERY important thing to consider here is that the cows name is HEMI! Is he in or not!?

SLINGER · Mar 1, 2005

LMAO! my girfriend is in another room asking "what the hell is so funny?"

MrBigwood, if you get that ex catholic schoolgirl topless carwash thing going, i'll defect to the Georgia chapter. count on that!

Old Guy · Mar 1, 2005

Holy Cow or donkey BW. I guess you evaded those nasty tax guys! Just imagine what it would be like when all those local women's boyfriends, husbands, and fathers take after you!

By the way have you heard that Mr. Hemi's evil twin step-brother invaded the site. His name is Mr. Quadsteer.

Twistdmetal · Mar 1, 2005

Guest · Mar 1, 2005

Thats great! LOL Well, does she have a blower?

TooTallll · Mar 1, 2005

LOL...Hey Mr B. ya think we can enter her in the "What can you Hemi"...ya know my Grandma used to say "What'ya think I got a motor up my butt"...when us grand kids over worked her...

MrBigwood · Mar 1, 2005

If we can get roller skates on the cow I do not see a reason we could not HEMI UP on Fernandos ride.The cow would be used for "steering".....Oh God I can't resist a piss poor pun!Let us not lose our focus here...Is it a hemi truck or not,...let's hear it!!! This message has been edited. Last edited by: MrBigwood, document.write(''+ myTimeZone('Mon, 28 Feb 2005 23:36:31 GMT-0800', '01 March 2005 02:36 AM')+''); 01 March 2005 02:36 AM

TR1 Hemi · Mar 1, 2005

quote:Originally posted by SLINGER:
LMAO! my girfriend is in another room asking "what the hell is so funny?"

My wife has asked that many a time, when reading Bigwood literature.

TooTallll · Mar 1, 2005

If you can strap some ram horns on him I think he's in...Anything to help a Hemi Bro out...Along those lines Mr Bigwood for each new membeer you get to join I'll donate a one night stay in a one bedroom condo I just purchased as an investment. It's near Sanibel Island in South Florida.

It closed last week, so I thought that I would put it to good use. And to let all my other Hemi bro's and Sis' know in case anyone is interested in accommodations for an upcoming getaway to the island It's available for weekends or on a weekly basis. For now, I will
be handling bookings until I can find an agent.

Weekends will cost about $100 for three nights and $250 for the week.
These prices are low because they are for friends and family.

Prices will be a bit different for people I don't know, but I can discuss
that on an individual basis.

In any case, it's a one bedroom, high-rise unit that overlooks the ocean,
nestled among lush green pines , and has a lovely ocean view from every
window! See photo below...Anything for my Hemi Family...HEMI ON!!!

This message has been edited. Last edited by: TooTallll, document.write(''+ myTimeZone('Tue, 01 Mar 2005 02:05:27 GMT-0800', '01 March 2005 05:05 AM')+''); 01 March 2005 05:05 AM

Bones · Mar 1, 2005

Mr BW - It is difficult to tell from the current photo on whether Fernando's ride qualifies as a HEMI or not, the photo is not clear enough to tell if the head is hemispherical.

Old Guy · Mar 1, 2005

If Fernando can lay patches (Of any kind) I say he's in.

RANCHER · Mar 1, 2005

*D*G*I*H*...you ask if it had a blower? If you ever stand behind one in the spring when the grass starts to turn green you wont ever ask again. They can caugh and cover you at 20 feet, from head to toe. They definitely have blowers.

MrBigwood · Mar 1, 2005

That also answers the question addressing the issue of whether or not it can lay marks down of any kind.Thus the statement,"Fernando's HEMI will shit-N-git!!!", is 100% accurate.

Oh yeah..TooTall, I would like to reserve it for a week during hurricane season.Should be an awesome view of the waves ripping in!!

Guest · Mar 2, 2005

Go to your next appointment with the IRS in that thing Wood! After taking up two or three parking stalls and stinking up the place maybe they will drop your case just to get you out of there!

Saber · Mar 2, 2005

Fernando's ride looks as if it could be a Hemi, but need to see the motor first. What other mods does Fernando have on it? Oh! Hell, I say let him in.

Guest · Mar 2, 2005

Rancher, belive me.. I know. I come from farm country here in Cali, lots of dairies and more.. Seen it andhad it happen more than once. Ever had to walk a cow around for eating too much green stuff.. not fun...

MrBigwood · Mar 4, 2005

Don't worry about Fernando back there.For him it is safety first, which is why he always puts a cork in the cow before he takes to the drivers seat.He says it's like a turbocharger for overall speed but an overboost could be fatal for him or the cow.

This message has been edited. Last edited by: MrBigwood, document.write(''+ myTimeZone('Thu, 03 Mar 2005 21:43:40 GMT-0800', '04 March 2005 12:43 AM')+''); 04 March 2005 12:43 AM

HEMI-LAW · Mar 5, 2005

MR. BIGWOOD,
I dont care about Fernandos hemi, I just want to know if the car wash will take tokens, and where do you put them?

Guest · Mar 6, 2005

The little guy in the motor compartment with the big smile on his face(he's kinda hard to see in the dark) won't be smiling very much if that cork works loose!

Does this HEMI count...?

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