20 Steps To Becoming A Ricer - Hemi Truck Club
 
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Old 12-23-2011, 07:00 AM   #1
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20 Steps To Becoming A Ricer

Here's what u do, its cheap and it WILL work

1. Sell the American car.
2. Buy a mid 90's fwd Honda civic or Acura integral (trust me).
3. It needs to have dull paint and a primer body kit is a MUST (cracked in every place possible).
4. It can't have a rear bumper, that is a big NO NO.
5. The bigger the exhaust tip the better (hence why a back bumper will only slow you down if you cant fit a nice big muffler back there), nothing is more intimidating than the sound of a hoard of bees.
6. STICKER STICKERS STICKERS, slap on as many stickers of any brand as possible. Most importantly, dont forget to copy others that you see. Trying to out do your fellow ricers is a MUST. You MUST always want to have the newest mod or badest car!
7. The wing - anything that doesn't replicate the tail of a whale (yes, big) is a waste of time.
8. FOR GODS SAKE, do not forget the altezza tail lights (and projector head lights).
9. Stick on scoops - nothing works better than putting those little bastards everywhere possible.
10. Underglow lights - green, blue, red PUT THEM ON EVERYWHERE. The interior, under the car/hood, grille, etc. Illumination of the ground underneath your car is very very important.
11. Decals/Paint (Decals are way better) - have your gangster friend 'vandalize' your sweet ride with his crafty designs (flames, boxes, squiggly stripes, you know cool stuff).
12. Drop it - if something isn't scraping the ground, its not low enough.
13. Rims - they HAVE to scream "Bling Bling", hubcaps will suffice if you can't find a Mexican dealership to rob.
14. Interior - paint as many parts as possible the same (well slightly different shade) color as your car, seat covers over the front seat.
15. Gauges - buy as many as possible, ESPECIALLY the giant tachometer that lights up a pretty color telling you when to shift .
16. Carbon fiber is your FRIEND - buy any part you can for you car that is carbon fiber - hood, trunk, interior paneling, steering wheel cover, ANYTHING.
17. Lambo doors - do I even need to explain? DUH just get them.
18. Stereo system - get BIG BIG subwoofers, if people can't hear your trunk and fenders rattling from down the street, then don't bother attempting this.
19. Cold Air Intake - its the only and MOST important performance mod you need on these little rockets.
20. And most important of all, THE R BADGE, you HAVE to have a red R somewhere on the car, if you don't, kill yourself.

And that should get you somewhere around 600 HP my friend

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Old 12-23-2011, 07:03 AM   #2
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Old 12-23-2011, 07:16 AM   #3
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Old 12-23-2011, 07:46 AM   #4
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So many of those can be seen on a daily basis
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2006 SRT8 GC AWD 6.1 HEMI - 420 HP, 16 mpg... SOLD
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2009 Ram 5.7 HEMI QC 4X4 Laramie - bone stock for now

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Old 12-23-2011, 07:57 AM   #5
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Like this?



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Old 12-23-2011, 10:33 AM   #6
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Old 12-23-2011, 10:54 AM   #7
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That's a start Mike but you really need stuff like this:


BIG EXHAUST:

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Or this:



And NOOOOOOOO! This does not count!




NOW STICKERS!




or:



Umm.. does this count?




and for now - WINGS! ALTERED TAIL LIGHTS AND SCOOPS!

I don't think this counts as a wing:

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Does this count as a hood scoop?




WINGS! This is what I mean:




And SCOOPS!




Wings and Exhaust!



And Scoops:




Um.. no.. not this kind of tail light...




This kind of tail light:








Ok.. enough.. I think I'm gonna get sick now..

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Old 12-23-2011, 12:38 PM   #8
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This is where it's at.


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Old 12-23-2011, 04:54 PM   #9
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Here is one gauge all ricers need.

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Old 12-23-2011, 07:57 PM   #10
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Let's if I have become a ricer.....

1. Sell the American car. Nope still have the Ram
2. Buy a mid 90's fwd Honda civic or Acura integral (trust me). Nope '99 Civic
3. It needs to have dull paint and a primer body kit is a MUST (cracked in every place possible). Nope - No body kit
4. It can't have a rear bumper, that is a big NO NO. Nope - Has rear bumper
5. The bigger the exhaust tip the better (hence why a back bumper will only slow you down if you cant fit a nice big muffler back there), nothing is more intimidating than the sound of a hoard of bees. Has 4" muffler but fits stock location
6. STICKER STICKERS STICKERS, slap on as many stickers of any brand as possible. Most importantly, dont forget to copy others that you see. Trying to out do your fellow ricers is a MUST. You MUST always want to have the newest mod or badest car! NO STICKERS
7. The wing - anything that doesn't replicate the tail of a whale (yes, big) is a waste of time. No Wing
8. FOR GODS SAKE, do not forget the altezza tail lights (and projector head lights). Stock Headlights and Taillights
9. Stick on scoops - nothing works better than putting those little bastards everywhere possible. Has stock hood no stick on scoops
10. Underglow lights - green, blue, red PUT THEM ON EVERYWHERE. The interior, under the car/hood, grille, etc. Illumination of the ground underneath your car is very very important. Might get some interior lighting
11. Decals/Paint (Decals are way better) - have your gangster friend 'vandalize' your sweet ride with his crafty designs (flames, boxes, squiggly stripes, you know cool stuff). NO WAY NOT MY CAR
12. Drop it - if something isn't scraping the ground, its not low enough. Its lowered but only by about 1.5"
13. Rims - they HAVE to scream "Bling Bling", hubcaps will suffice if you can't find a Mexican dealership to rob. Has 17" aftermarket rims on it
14. Interior - paint as many parts as possible the same (well slightly different shade) color as your car, seat covers over the front seat. Some interior parts painted
15. Gauges - buy as many as possible, ESPECIALLY the giant tachometer that lights up a pretty color telling you when to shift . Nope - not doing that
16. Carbon fiber is your FRIEND - buy any part you can for you car that is carbon fiber - hood, trunk, interior paneling, steering wheel cover, ANYTHING. Not into Carbon Fiber
17. Lambo doors - do I even need to explain? DUH just get them. NO WAY
18. Stereo system - get BIG BIG subwoofers, if people can't hear your trunk and fenders rattling from down the street, then don't bother attempting this. OK, I am guilty here
19. Cold Air Intake - its the only and MOST important performance mod you need on these little rockets. Guilty on this one too
20. And most important of all, THE R BADGE, you HAVE to have a red R somewhere on the car, if you don't, kill yourself. Only badges on the car is the front and rear H

And that should get you somewhere around 600 HP my friend Not even close, the RAM will SMOKE it.
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